wasn't feeling well last night, so i slept early. considered early compare to the past few days. had few dreams in eleven and a half hours sleep, yes i slept more than eleven hours. i hate it when i'm sick, cause i will be having nightmare or some really sad dream when i'm sick. i'm not going to tell what i dreamt here but it certainly remind me of something. i knew the rules, i knew the phrase that, " something don't belongs to you, will remain to be not yours ". it does apply on people's life and i know it is true but just simply ignore it. from the beginning, i know this is going to happen in my life but still side off the negative thoughts and try really hard to work on it. the consequences for being so stubborn is hurting myself. something to be rejoice is, i only hurt myself and not others.
was so silly to even think of i'm more important and that's also what motivate me to continue my really wrong thought. i woke up with tears. that's something hardly happen since don't know when. tears of mine represented my countless scar deep inside me covered by camouflage staunch. what hurt the most is not to have those cut on my heart, but knowing i got no courage to wait for the thing i always wanted.
went out with my friends. one of them told me i don't look like who i were anymore. he said nowadays he seldom see me smile in class. smiling, being happy, crazy are what i'm suppose to be in class. but now, whenever he look at me, he saw sorrows and he saw me trying so hard to smile even though only my mouth is smiling but my eyes can't lie that i'm not smiling cause of happy. i'm surprised by him. at least, there's someone cares. i don't know if that's a good thing but i felt warm when he said that. i know it's ok to be weak, i know it's ok to be soft but i tried not to anymore. i'm afraid of relying on somebody. i feel that being alone no longer something i'm afraid of, instead i felt safe. cause when i'm alone, i don't need to pretend, i can be myself. i can let my tears drop like someone had turn on the water tap but forget to close it. i can let my emotion to be express in all kind of ways without worrying somebody might think i'm mentally disorder person. i can just be myself. but isn't that pathetic? i got no idea. bought a few books. hopefully, reading can cure my feelings.
Sunday
Saturday
Amber 383
i'm so dead *put it in right way* sylvia is so dead. i missed my family and friends so much! is not like i'm having serious homesick or culturer shock but i really really miss my family and friends. i missed going jln aloh with my parents and brother for supper. missed going klang for bah kut teh. missed hugging my daddy, mummy. missed sharing fashion idea with my brother!! anyhow, mom and bro will be coming over in few days time. can't wait to meet them! *smile* kok fai called in msn and had a talk with him. remind me of those days in lion dance troupe like what sam and i were talking about that night. after that, talked to marcus on phone. i realized i actually missing them. although we don't really contact each other while i'm back in malaysia but at least i know there are always there for me! chat with claudia online as well. she seems to be really busy but still cares for me. missed those days at help, friendster cafe and hanging around with my jazz. sigh. i really hope to go back soon. but it's impossible. wait for me buddies!! let's go clubbing when i'm back. *laugh*
the very first night out with sally. ohh, i haven't mention her in my blog before i guess. sally is a chinese-indon. she's skinny, funny, girlish and friendly. a nice girl to hang around with. although she seldom come for class, but we can still talk, as in we got something to talk about. she's really nice. last night was my first time to amber 383 with sally. we met up with anson, hugo and others at pucchini before going. i like amber 383 very much. like the atmosphere compare to hushbar. it's like more happening in amber. we got a table and were in the freelist. had glass of chivas mixed with coke before entering the dance floor. i realized sally can drink and she know types of drinks which i don't even remember the name of few. end up, we had chivas mixed coke, tequila, cough medicine, bacardi 151 and also some vodka which i don't remember the name.
the very first night out with sally. ohh, i haven't mention her in my blog before i guess. sally is a chinese-indon. she's skinny, funny, girlish and friendly. a nice girl to hang around with. although she seldom come for class, but we can still talk, as in we got something to talk about. she's really nice. last night was my first time to amber 383 with sally. we met up with anson, hugo and others at pucchini before going. i like amber 383 very much. like the atmosphere compare to hushbar. it's like more happening in amber. we got a table and were in the freelist. had glass of chivas mixed with coke before entering the dance floor. i realized sally can drink and she know types of drinks which i don't even remember the name of few. end up, we had chivas mixed coke, tequila, cough medicine, bacardi 151 and also some vodka which i don't remember the name.
Monday
Starts Being Weird
everyone seems to be in a lazy mood. we were having maths class with mr n and legal studies class with miss e. i got no idea how or what have i done in maths class beside drafting what to do for my english assignment. as for legal studies, she seems to has her pms on today. or maybe i should say, she has pms everyday. miss e showed us some videos to help us understand more on the federation of australia. but she got no idea that most of us were yawning in class and wasn't paying much attention on it. i realized how bad i was for not concentrating in class but it doesn't mean i don't listen at all. i do know what's going on in class. well, maybe what i need the most now is to get enough sleeps. i'm exhausted.
planned to celebrate zoe's birthday a week ago. although her birthday's over but yet we're in the mood to sing for her and wish her happy birthday. after class, went crown cafe to get her the mango gateux and two custard puff for my friend. she met me around 6.30 in the evening and we went to buy some drinks. reached sam's place before 7pm. he started to prepare stuff for steamboat. did i mention we had tom yam steamboat tonight? while waiting, i forced zoe to watch final destination 3 with me. caleen and desmond joined us after a while. was so full and we forced ourselves to finish up the food. laughters covered the room when zoe and i started a game with punishment to eat. oh my god ! i'm putting on weight now, definitely.
Don't you think we're retarded ?? Caleen. Sylvia. 1/4 of Zoe
hahaha. cookie look so uncomfortable to be grabbed by me !!!!! whatever~
planned to celebrate zoe's birthday a week ago. although her birthday's over but yet we're in the mood to sing for her and wish her happy birthday. after class, went crown cafe to get her the mango gateux and two custard puff for my friend. she met me around 6.30 in the evening and we went to buy some drinks. reached sam's place before 7pm. he started to prepare stuff for steamboat. did i mention we had tom yam steamboat tonight? while waiting, i forced zoe to watch final destination 3 with me. caleen and desmond joined us after a while. was so full and we forced ourselves to finish up the food. laughters covered the room when zoe and i started a game with punishment to eat. oh my god ! i'm putting on weight now, definitely.
Don't you think we're retarded ?? Caleen. Sylvia. 1/4 of Zoe
hahaha. cookie look so uncomfortable to be grabbed by me !!!!! whatever~
Sunday
When Stars Stop Shining
wondering if any of you look up to the sky these nights. if you did, i guess we were looking at the same stars and sky. i realized i love the night more than day. i showed the real me when there is no one around, and when i'm facing the sky of the night. looking at the stars give me a kind of peaceful emotion. seeing them shines make me smile as if they are talking to me. i often says the stars significant me and my personality. i shine when i'm happy and when i'm full of dreams and hope. i shine when i'm crying and full of sorrows. but what if there's one day, the stars stop shining? what does it mean? after a little deep thought on it, i realized. when stars stop shining, it means the star has lost her feelings. feelings to anything around. when stars gave up on it, it seems more like a dead body without spirit. let's hope stars don't stop shining, cause it glamour when it shines. without it, stars will only be the ugly meteorolite.
went hushbar with classmates last thursday. wasn't that enjoy but it was not as bad as i thought it would be. the event is called Temptation and it's organized by brother of a friend of mine. danced with few guys from university of melbourne and they're malaysian as well. sigh. wherever i go, surrounded by malaysian, china people, hong kong people and indonesian. i want somebody from different country!! *smile* went amber with wan, anson, andy, nicole they all on friday night. amber reopen night, met ahwen there. he's cute. and saw the guy that danced with me the night before. the world ain't big. aeni introduced ade to me after that. he was indonesian and brought up in vietnam but i haven't hear him speaking indon yet. anyhow, the only thing that reminds me of him is the unique hair style.
Saturday
Alphabet
Grabbed this from a friend of mine. Just decided to put up something different!!
*wink*
A- Available?
~yes. i'm single. and available now!! *laugh*
B- Best friends?
~i don't believe best friend. (ref to my previous post).
but a lot of close friends.
C- Celebrity crushes?
~well. not really.
D- Dog's name?
~if i can have one, it will be 'puffy' or 'yumi'
E- Easiest person to talk to?
~basically i can talk to everyone i'm comfy with.
F- Favourite singers?
~don't have a particular one. depends on songs.
G- Gummy bears or gummy worms?
~gummy bears
H- Hometown?
~malaysia
I- Instrument?
~piano
L- Longest car ride?
~from selangor to singapore
M- Milk flavour?
~normal milk will do. but it has to be low fat.
N- Number of sublings?
~two. a younger brother & yonger sister
O- One wish?
~wishes come true
P- Person last texted you?
~jason, sally, zoe
Q- favourite Quote?
~i rather you hate me for being me than love me from being somebody.
R- Reason to smile?
~feel like smiling
S- song you last heard?
~stars are blind - paris hilton
T- Time you woke up?
~around 12.15noon
U- Unknown facts about me?
~remain unknown
V- Veggie you hate?
~love veggies.
X- X-rays you've had?
~backbone x-ray.
Y- Yummy food?
~as long as it taste good. i love eating!!
Z- Zodiac sign?
~suppose to be capricorn & aquarius. but don't judge me by usin it, its totally different.
*wink*
A- Available?
~yes. i'm single. and available now!! *laugh*
B- Best friends?
~i don't believe best friend. (ref to my previous post).
but a lot of close friends.
C- Celebrity crushes?
~well. not really.
D- Dog's name?
~if i can have one, it will be 'puffy' or 'yumi'
E- Easiest person to talk to?
~basically i can talk to everyone i'm comfy with.
F- Favourite singers?
~don't have a particular one. depends on songs.
G- Gummy bears or gummy worms?
~gummy bears
H- Hometown?
~malaysia
I- Instrument?
~piano
L- Longest car ride?
~from selangor to singapore
M- Milk flavour?
~normal milk will do. but it has to be low fat.
N- Number of sublings?
~two. a younger brother & yonger sister
O- One wish?
~wishes come true
P- Person last texted you?
~jason, sally, zoe
Q- favourite Quote?
~i rather you hate me for being me than love me from being somebody.
R- Reason to smile?
~feel like smiling
S- song you last heard?
~stars are blind - paris hilton
T- Time you woke up?
~around 12.15noon
U- Unknown facts about me?
~remain unknown
V- Veggie you hate?
~love veggies.
X- X-rays you've had?
~backbone x-ray.
Y- Yummy food?
~as long as it taste good. i love eating!!
Z- Zodiac sign?
~suppose to be capricorn & aquarius. but don't judge me by usin it, its totally different.
Girls
wondering what is going on to everyone. it's been days since i last feel awkward about it. people seems to be walking in and out from my sight, my thoughts. without even notice it, some of them left silently. maybe that's the life style of young teenagers at my age now. was thinking how can the word best friends exist. frankly speaking, i lost confidence on it. i do believe there's forever friends but no longer trust on best friends. especially when it come to best friends with the same sex, which is my gbf "girl best friends". used to have a couple of them, which i thought they were my best friends. as in, they acted like they are. but as what i used, 'acted'. one day, when i'm no longer useful, or they found somebody more suitable to be best friend with, i'm being dump aside. people thought guys don't worth trustworthy or stuff like that, but guess they just lucky not having girlfriends that don't even worth believing. whenever girls are around, there will be rumors, there will be jealousy, there will be some bitchy stories on and off. as for guys, they are more straight-forward, and they don't really turn the words into action. instead, girls done it quietly. by looking innocent and good girl labeled, girls can do a lot of things without getting blame or questioned by others. well, prolly there are thousands of girls out there are going to report my post and banned me, but people! i'm telling the truth. and i'm pretty sure lot of you girls out there felt it before. bullied by girls are way worst than bullied by guys. girls put it in different way, not only physical way but also in spiritual suffering. i just don't understand why must this happen. well, there's not always an answer for a question. and often, those girls are pretty, hot and popular. put it in other way, they're bimbos. they thought they got the guys behind their back. well, there are guys behind their back, cause of their beauty. but it won't last for long. they're attracted by the face and body, not the inner beauty. sigh. what to do? some guys go after girls with look than with brain. but wake up dude!! not all girls with brain are ugly. they're prettier.
hope most of you watch 'mean girls' starred by lindsay lohan. it shows the life of girls not only in high school but everywhere. even primary school kids. they tried to look good, perfume, make-up, acting like a model, or i should say model wannabe.. even worst, trying to be someone they're not, someone like the famous girl in school, the most welcoming girl in town or in party. hey!! don't you people realize that you are losing your identity? the world's full of the clone of somebody, soon. there's no need for the scientist to experiment on cloning or stuff. they just have to come out with somebody that's totally a role model, a fine lady for the girls to go after. and that's.. so sad.
hope most of you watch 'mean girls' starred by lindsay lohan. it shows the life of girls not only in high school but everywhere. even primary school kids. they tried to look good, perfume, make-up, acting like a model, or i should say model wannabe.. even worst, trying to be someone they're not, someone like the famous girl in school, the most welcoming girl in town or in party. hey!! don't you people realize that you are losing your identity? the world's full of the clone of somebody, soon. there's no need for the scientist to experiment on cloning or stuff. they just have to come out with somebody that's totally a role model, a fine lady for the girls to go after. and that's.. so sad.
Wednesday
Crime Scene Investigation
my mood is back to study mood now. after 10days of holiday i seriously feel so lazy to go to class every weekdays. was supposed to sleep till 4 pm as what i did during the holidays but now i have to wake up at 8something in the morning to go to school.
english assignment !! i'm in the second group with jacky, sofia and mohammed. we decided and chosen a really exciting topic, the crime scene investigation. we're going to film it as well, for oral presentation used. going to make a short movie from how the crime committed, the procedure of collecting evidence and scientific ways and the punishment. i'm really excited cause i'll be the victim! the girl who got killed. hahaha. people might feel that i'm so abnormal to be excited as my part is to be killed. well, that's me. how cool will it be if i act it really scary and die in a horrible way? i'm looking forward to be 'killed'. just hope this assignment won't be as bored as the legal studies assignment. at least i should have some fun while filming it. *smile*
i was thinking to do something on astrology and body language as i really want to get into details on stuff like that. but it's so general and might be a bored topic to be film. so end up, i'm stuck with the crime scene investigation. before that, we even thought of doing something like 'world crimes'. acting all kind of crimes happening in the world and reports on it. would be really fun to act it out. like rob the shops, raping, killing, fighting and others. but lou rejected. too bad. *sad*
english assignment !! i'm in the second group with jacky, sofia and mohammed. we decided and chosen a really exciting topic, the crime scene investigation. we're going to film it as well, for oral presentation used. going to make a short movie from how the crime committed, the procedure of collecting evidence and scientific ways and the punishment. i'm really excited cause i'll be the victim! the girl who got killed. hahaha. people might feel that i'm so abnormal to be excited as my part is to be killed. well, that's me. how cool will it be if i act it really scary and die in a horrible way? i'm looking forward to be 'killed'. just hope this assignment won't be as bored as the legal studies assignment. at least i should have some fun while filming it. *smile*
i was thinking to do something on astrology and body language as i really want to get into details on stuff like that. but it's so general and might be a bored topic to be film. so end up, i'm stuck with the crime scene investigation. before that, we even thought of doing something like 'world crimes'. acting all kind of crimes happening in the world and reports on it. would be really fun to act it out. like rob the shops, raping, killing, fighting and others. but lou rejected. too bad. *sad*
Monday
Recommenced
my mid semester break is over. classes recommenced. first class, mathematic with nick, he gave us a so-called big news. our mid semester test for maths will be on the 31st of July, which is the day after my mother & brother arrive melbourne. it's not really a big issue anyway, topics like linear programming and matrices are what i've learn back in kl. just some of the method like the cramer's rules and stuff i know nothing bout it. guess i'll just have to do more maths at the mean time. *smile* went to city library to get my card done like what told by lou. on the way to flinders lane, i stopped by the quicksilver shop. got myself a grey roxy top, a black roxy top and a black roxy shorts. satisfied? not really. *laugh* legal studies in the noon was going on as usual but she let us out one hour earlier. after that, i went to china town with vivian and bought amy cheung's book. lovin' it. as in, at least i got something to read.
went again on saturday night with aeni. and meet up with anson. i'm glad i went actually. although the three tequila shots really means nothing to me, but i enjoyed the music and the dance. especially dancing with another two young lady and also with 'ah wen', anson's friend. i miss dancin' with him. *smile*
chat with min ern on msn. oh my god, i miss him so much! heard that? my honey monkey!! can't wait till i get back to malaysia and meet everyone of em. promised to go clubbing with long cheak, douglas they all. i'm so happy that min ern's comin' to australia soon!! well, not that soon actually, it's another year but.. soon!! hahaha. trust me honey! we'll be crazy and wipe out the clubs. hahaha. you know me, i know you!
went again on saturday night with aeni. and meet up with anson. i'm glad i went actually. although the three tequila shots really means nothing to me, but i enjoyed the music and the dance. especially dancing with another two young lady and also with 'ah wen', anson's friend. i miss dancin' with him. *smile*
chat with min ern on msn. oh my god, i miss him so much! heard that? my honey monkey!! can't wait till i get back to malaysia and meet everyone of em. promised to go clubbing with long cheak, douglas they all. i'm so happy that min ern's comin' to australia soon!! well, not that soon actually, it's another year but.. soon!! hahaha. trust me honey! we'll be crazy and wipe out the clubs. hahaha. you know me, i know you!
Saturday
One Night Out
i woke up late in the afternoon when zoe rang and came over my place. i will be sleeping if she'd not come over. got my laundry done and vacuum my room as well. don't feel like going anywhere.
went out with anson, hugo, jennifer and william last night with another bunch of friends. had fun dancing and drinking with them. had tequila, chivas, coke and ice water. beside drinking, we danced. not to say non-stop but dance all night till they closed. enjoyed dancing with them as well. met wan and his friend, andy, they were working and he seems to be kinda of shocked when he saw me. hot dancing with anson. tease dancing with a hot chick which i don't even know who she is. sexy dancing with jennifer, william and hugo they all. i like it. hahaha. everyone were in a high mood. and it ends early in the morning, which is around 4 am.
received his sms while dancing. was in a really happy mood. and it makes me even happier and high to dance. something like that easily pleased me. easily bring up my mood, easily make me happy all night. *smile*
went out with anson, hugo, jennifer and william last night with another bunch of friends. had fun dancing and drinking with them. had tequila, chivas, coke and ice water. beside drinking, we danced. not to say non-stop but dance all night till they closed. enjoyed dancing with them as well. met wan and his friend, andy, they were working and he seems to be kinda of shocked when he saw me. hot dancing with anson. tease dancing with a hot chick which i don't even know who she is. sexy dancing with jennifer, william and hugo they all. i like it. hahaha. everyone were in a high mood. and it ends early in the morning, which is around 4 am.
received his sms while dancing. was in a really happy mood. and it makes me even happier and high to dance. something like that easily pleased me. easily bring up my mood, easily make me happy all night. *smile*
Thursday
Alone = Lonely ??
my life has been a little messed up nowadays.
i doesn't look like myself at all, been doing something i normally don't do it.
i realized i'm so not me to wait for someone's call when i know the chances really low. which is something i dislike doing and promised myself not to do it ever since god-know-when. yet, i'm starting to act like a silly girl waiting for somebody's phone call, which he/she actually doesn't care much. well, i'm not sure if he/she cares, cause we're sort of playing mind game now. after few days of facing this fucked-up situation, i come out with a conclusion. i think i should stop being somebody i'm not or i don't want to be. instead, i should be the one i'm more familiar with, i'm comfortable with. which is happy, not entangles the person even if i really love and care. so, wish me luck and welcome me, i'm back to be who i am.
was thinking about being alone and feeling lonely.
why am i feeling the loneliness when i'm in the crowd. not that my friends ignore me or stuff, but i still feel the loneliness cover myself up even they're talking to me or paying attention on me. i'm okey with being alone. being alone at home, doing stuff alone, eating alone, sleeping alone. but it seems to be another thing when i'm feeling lonely. being alone doesn't mean i'm feeling lonely. yet the feeling part is way more scarier than the physical part. it's some sort of mentally disturbance that i personally dislike it. well, maybe it's the matter of time. or maybe i'm a little over-react. i'm pretty sure many of my friends, even strangers out there might facing the same feelings i'm having. but alone doesn't equal to lonely. at first i doubt it, but now? yea~ i agree with it. alone is not equal to lonely.
i doesn't look like myself at all, been doing something i normally don't do it.
i realized i'm so not me to wait for someone's call when i know the chances really low. which is something i dislike doing and promised myself not to do it ever since god-know-when. yet, i'm starting to act like a silly girl waiting for somebody's phone call, which he/she actually doesn't care much. well, i'm not sure if he/she cares, cause we're sort of playing mind game now. after few days of facing this fucked-up situation, i come out with a conclusion. i think i should stop being somebody i'm not or i don't want to be. instead, i should be the one i'm more familiar with, i'm comfortable with. which is happy, not entangles the person even if i really love and care. so, wish me luck and welcome me, i'm back to be who i am.
was thinking about being alone and feeling lonely.
why am i feeling the loneliness when i'm in the crowd. not that my friends ignore me or stuff, but i still feel the loneliness cover myself up even they're talking to me or paying attention on me. i'm okey with being alone. being alone at home, doing stuff alone, eating alone, sleeping alone. but it seems to be another thing when i'm feeling lonely. being alone doesn't mean i'm feeling lonely. yet the feeling part is way more scarier than the physical part. it's some sort of mentally disturbance that i personally dislike it. well, maybe it's the matter of time. or maybe i'm a little over-react. i'm pretty sure many of my friends, even strangers out there might facing the same feelings i'm having. but alone doesn't equal to lonely. at first i doubt it, but now? yea~ i agree with it. alone is not equal to lonely.
Wednesday
Memoirs of Form Two
i just feel like posting what had happen few years ago, when i was 14 years old, when i was in junior high school. i think it was my happiest and most unforgettable year among the five years of secondary schooling. wasn't realize it is precious to me until me and sam was talking about it for hours and we laughed. i almost remember everything that happened in every single month, maybe some of them not that clear, but it still stuck in my mind.
january. i was ang's girlfriend. kah yin, my close friend was fai's girlfriend. they were really a sweet couple, but me and ang definitely not. we sat in the reading corner for hours without having a click, i knew there's something wrong. so i wrote him a letter, saying i wanted to end the relationship and requested him to be my so-called 'brother'. he accepted. did i mentioned i'm in the catholic high school lion dance group? yes, i am. with kah yin and sheryl.
february. went somewhere to perform with the lion dance group after broke up a week with ang. got to know the guys more. and met a kind of funny and easy going guy. doesn't know his name until my other friends, thian yit and fai they all told me he is sam. this was the first time going out of school compound with the lion dance group to perform, and it seriously made an impact. the group included fai, wing, cheng mun, vincent, farzefreen, sheryl, me, kah yin, thian yit, wee hoong, wei leong, cheng kit, joon keat, joon hui, sam.. that's all i remember. after performance, sam got my number from god-knows-who. we talked a little the following days. and on the third day of knowing him, we're couple. that's a fast click. back to school, first day seeing each other after coupling, was in the hall. everything goes on sweet and nice. first time holding hands was that day, in front of jonathan.
march. sports day preparation started. lion dance preparing to join the whole malaysia championship competition as well. to not be like a bimbo, i seriously spend more time on lion dance training, and starting to like it. everytime fai & sam practicing, i remember me and kah yin were the two worrying. cause our boyfriends were the back guy of the lion and it's the dangerous one as they hardly see what's going on in front. sometimes they almost fall, sometimes they fell. although worried, but i like seeing him doing lion dance. while sweating, as girlfriend we wiped, we brought them water, we sat and be like the cushion for them to laid on.
forgot the month. but the lion dance competition held at the genting highland. three girls which is me, sheryl and kah yin followed the guys. that's somewhere unforgettable for the group. we having fun. we practiced. we saw others were doing great. we ain't bad anyway. there was a place for the lion dance members to have lunch and dinner. the food sucks and i can still remember the taste. and not forget those food make cheng kit stay up at night to be in the toilet. but we enjoyed being together. those moment, precious. after the competition, we went outdoor theme park as well. played like crazy. sam and i went to the wetting boat as well as farzefreen, kah yin, kok fai and the others. i remembered after being wet, i was freezing and sam the sweetheart took off his jacket and put it on me. and i felt he was shivering as well. that's sweet!!
beside lion dancing, i joined almost every single kind of ball games. volleyball, handball, netball, basketball for my sport house. thanks to the teacher in charge that brave enough to put my name in without asking me. but it becomes a legend as well. i was in the red house, and it never win any of it before. volleyball, handball and netball, we were losing at the beginning but me and my team managed to twist the result and be the champion for this three ball games. listen carefully, is the champion! for volleyball, handball and netball. as for basketball, we were the first runner up with good scores. it's impossible to beat the blue house cause all the players were my teammate back in maba which is the state players training center. *smile*
lots and lots of memories coming back in my mind. and my favorite weapon which i creatively invented is the famous 'pepsi twist'. lots of my friends tried. even sam, as my boyfriend. and his other buddies like min fei, jonathan, choon yu etc. min fei tried the hard one. after he had a pepsi twist from me, min fei complained to sam and the effect is sam gave him another pepsi twist. *laugh* poor min fei. and also not forget that during the check-up time for students by our discipline teacher, min fei and sam were singing 'pretty women' and she turned back. everyone laughed. gosh! there's so much more to say... but i have to stop.
january. i was ang's girlfriend. kah yin, my close friend was fai's girlfriend. they were really a sweet couple, but me and ang definitely not. we sat in the reading corner for hours without having a click, i knew there's something wrong. so i wrote him a letter, saying i wanted to end the relationship and requested him to be my so-called 'brother'. he accepted. did i mentioned i'm in the catholic high school lion dance group? yes, i am. with kah yin and sheryl.
february. went somewhere to perform with the lion dance group after broke up a week with ang. got to know the guys more. and met a kind of funny and easy going guy. doesn't know his name until my other friends, thian yit and fai they all told me he is sam. this was the first time going out of school compound with the lion dance group to perform, and it seriously made an impact. the group included fai, wing, cheng mun, vincent, farzefreen, sheryl, me, kah yin, thian yit, wee hoong, wei leong, cheng kit, joon keat, joon hui, sam.. that's all i remember. after performance, sam got my number from god-knows-who. we talked a little the following days. and on the third day of knowing him, we're couple. that's a fast click. back to school, first day seeing each other after coupling, was in the hall. everything goes on sweet and nice. first time holding hands was that day, in front of jonathan.
march. sports day preparation started. lion dance preparing to join the whole malaysia championship competition as well. to not be like a bimbo, i seriously spend more time on lion dance training, and starting to like it. everytime fai & sam practicing, i remember me and kah yin were the two worrying. cause our boyfriends were the back guy of the lion and it's the dangerous one as they hardly see what's going on in front. sometimes they almost fall, sometimes they fell. although worried, but i like seeing him doing lion dance. while sweating, as girlfriend we wiped, we brought them water, we sat and be like the cushion for them to laid on.
forgot the month. but the lion dance competition held at the genting highland. three girls which is me, sheryl and kah yin followed the guys. that's somewhere unforgettable for the group. we having fun. we practiced. we saw others were doing great. we ain't bad anyway. there was a place for the lion dance members to have lunch and dinner. the food sucks and i can still remember the taste. and not forget those food make cheng kit stay up at night to be in the toilet. but we enjoyed being together. those moment, precious. after the competition, we went outdoor theme park as well. played like crazy. sam and i went to the wetting boat as well as farzefreen, kah yin, kok fai and the others. i remembered after being wet, i was freezing and sam the sweetheart took off his jacket and put it on me. and i felt he was shivering as well. that's sweet!!
beside lion dancing, i joined almost every single kind of ball games. volleyball, handball, netball, basketball for my sport house. thanks to the teacher in charge that brave enough to put my name in without asking me. but it becomes a legend as well. i was in the red house, and it never win any of it before. volleyball, handball and netball, we were losing at the beginning but me and my team managed to twist the result and be the champion for this three ball games. listen carefully, is the champion! for volleyball, handball and netball. as for basketball, we were the first runner up with good scores. it's impossible to beat the blue house cause all the players were my teammate back in maba which is the state players training center. *smile*
lots and lots of memories coming back in my mind. and my favorite weapon which i creatively invented is the famous 'pepsi twist'. lots of my friends tried. even sam, as my boyfriend. and his other buddies like min fei, jonathan, choon yu etc. min fei tried the hard one. after he had a pepsi twist from me, min fei complained to sam and the effect is sam gave him another pepsi twist. *laugh* poor min fei. and also not forget that during the check-up time for students by our discipline teacher, min fei and sam were singing 'pretty women' and she turned back. everyone laughed. gosh! there's so much more to say... but i have to stop.
It Ain't Fair
visited emily's blog few minutes ago. she seems to be going through something tough now. parents comparing her and the brother, she's been doing everything but ain't no credits. hey hon, just wanna let you know there ain't total fair in this world. nothing can be 100% fair. sometimes we just have to bear with it, accept it even it's not fair. thinking about it sometimes making you feel more depress, and i personally don't like that feelings. *grin* hope you'll get over it soon.
i had dinner with sam last night at rice bar. before that, we went cafe pucchini for a drink. ordered two heineken and starts our talk. he's kinda in deep shit for not attending classes. and some relationship problems. hope you get over it buddy! and same goes to me. *smile* after the drink, we went rice bar for dinner. had a long nice chat. missed those days we had back in malaysia. i mean our form 2 student life in catholic high school and when both of us were in the lion dance troupe. remind me of my favorite pinch, which they called the 'pepsi twist'. poor min fei was the victim of me and sam. *laugh* we had fun practicing, competition, performing the lion dance. same interest we had. i wasn't so into lion dance at first till i starts to be part of the group. it gave me a lot of unforgettable memories. *smile*
i had dinner with sam last night at rice bar. before that, we went cafe pucchini for a drink. ordered two heineken and starts our talk. he's kinda in deep shit for not attending classes. and some relationship problems. hope you get over it buddy! and same goes to me. *smile* after the drink, we went rice bar for dinner. had a long nice chat. missed those days we had back in malaysia. i mean our form 2 student life in catholic high school and when both of us were in the lion dance troupe. remind me of my favorite pinch, which they called the 'pepsi twist'. poor min fei was the victim of me and sam. *laugh* we had fun practicing, competition, performing the lion dance. same interest we had. i wasn't so into lion dance at first till i starts to be part of the group. it gave me a lot of unforgettable memories. *smile*
Tuesday
I Do Miss Em
Finally, another post after 5days. I'm not lazy to blog but I just don't feel like doing it in the past few days. Which I don't even know why. Well, maybe because my life starts to be boring? Who knows. Anyway, my life in Melbourne ain't bored at all. I got friends over here. And to be honest, they treat me quite good. Was worried if I'm able to hang around with them but now? There isn't an issue anymore. We just have fun being together.
Sexy Son left comments on my previous post. Thanks hon. I appreciate it. Don't know there's people reading it till you left a note there. I'm feeling much better. Well, I still have to bear with it although it is still going on. So, like what you said. I concentrate on other things and try not to worry about it. Loneliness will be replaced by something someday in the future. At the mean time, I think the best way is to leave it and see how it goes. No point for me to be thinking on and on. Waste of time and waste of energy. *grin* Luff you babe!
Watched Pirates of Caribbean : Dead Man's Chest that chilling night. I missed GSC's caramel pop corn so much. You have no idea how salty is the pop corn in Hoyts. Pirates of Caribbean 2 wasn't that bad. It's pretty funny. At least I laugh a lot when Captain Jack Sparrow chased by a bunch of 'orang asli'. And when Orlando Bloom run in a big bamboo ball. The only part I dislike is the stupid Octopus!! David Jones huh. He's disgusting. *puke* Anyhow, I enjoyed watching the movie. Just can't wait to watch The Fast & The Furious : Tokyo Drift again with the royal devil. I seriously don't mind to watch it again and again. Love the cars, chicks ain't THAT hot but not bad, will be better if there are HOT guys but to bad there isn't. Ohh Wait! There's one. The Japanese fella which I don't even get to hear anyone calling his name. He's hot, he's cute, but he is not the happening character. Too bad.
Chat with my dad last night. And I realized I actually miss my family a lot. I miss them very much. Wasn't crying cause of missing ever since Sam told me it's no use crying cause I have to be here alone anyway. But I seriously feeling homesick right now. Well, not a major one of course. I just miss my dad, my mom, my brother and also my little sister. My tears almost dropped out from my eye sockets when daddy is asking if I miss them. What a question? Of course I miss. Everyday. And I mean it. Although I have friends here, I got lots of things to do and hang around here. But I earnestly miss my home. Even my sexy little Honda jazz!! And also my friends. I have another bunch of peeps here, yet I still miss my other groups back in home country. Shit! I miss almost everyone, every minute, everyday.
FIFA World Cup Germany 2006 is over. As my friends wish, Italy grabbed the Champion honor.
Sexy Son left comments on my previous post. Thanks hon. I appreciate it. Don't know there's people reading it till you left a note there. I'm feeling much better. Well, I still have to bear with it although it is still going on. So, like what you said. I concentrate on other things and try not to worry about it. Loneliness will be replaced by something someday in the future. At the mean time, I think the best way is to leave it and see how it goes. No point for me to be thinking on and on. Waste of time and waste of energy. *grin* Luff you babe!
Watched Pirates of Caribbean : Dead Man's Chest that chilling night. I missed GSC's caramel pop corn so much. You have no idea how salty is the pop corn in Hoyts. Pirates of Caribbean 2 wasn't that bad. It's pretty funny. At least I laugh a lot when Captain Jack Sparrow chased by a bunch of 'orang asli'. And when Orlando Bloom run in a big bamboo ball. The only part I dislike is the stupid Octopus!! David Jones huh. He's disgusting. *puke* Anyhow, I enjoyed watching the movie. Just can't wait to watch The Fast & The Furious : Tokyo Drift again with the royal devil. I seriously don't mind to watch it again and again. Love the cars, chicks ain't THAT hot but not bad, will be better if there are HOT guys but to bad there isn't. Ohh Wait! There's one. The Japanese fella which I don't even get to hear anyone calling his name. He's hot, he's cute, but he is not the happening character. Too bad.
Chat with my dad last night. And I realized I actually miss my family a lot. I miss them very much. Wasn't crying cause of missing ever since Sam told me it's no use crying cause I have to be here alone anyway. But I seriously feeling homesick right now. Well, not a major one of course. I just miss my dad, my mom, my brother and also my little sister. My tears almost dropped out from my eye sockets when daddy is asking if I miss them. What a question? Of course I miss. Everyday. And I mean it. Although I have friends here, I got lots of things to do and hang around here. But I earnestly miss my home. Even my sexy little Honda jazz!! And also my friends. I have another bunch of peeps here, yet I still miss my other groups back in home country. Shit! I miss almost everyone, every minute, everyday.
FIFA World Cup Germany 2006 is over. As my friends wish, Italy grabbed the Champion honor.
Thursday
More Concern
It's another day in Melbourne.
Another lonely day. Maybe I shouldn't say I'm all alone. But.. Have you ever fell in this situation? Where, there's a lot of people around but yet you felt so lonely.. Another lonely-phobia here! I don't really want that feeling to cover me up like I'm anti-social or anything, but sometimes I just don't know how to avoid it. At first, thought reading can cure the loneliness I'm having. But guess I'm wrong. So wrong! What I really want is something physically accompany. It's not like I'm obsess to have a boyfriend or anything. But I just need somebody there when I'm alone, when I'm scare, when I'm so confuse.. so.. Helpless. Sometimes, it's hard to do stuff all by yourself. Especially, when you know you're not that tough to handle everything by your own. But people around you thought you're tough enough to take everything. And they'll leave you with all the force.
Something happened. She's been robbed while buying stuff at the pharmacist. Although she tried to tell me in a more casual and relaxing way, but I know, I understand deep down inside.. She's shivering. How can she not be panic? She faced it all by herself. Without him around, without me around. This night. I cried. My 'him' is here to accompany me. Telling me everything would be alright. I know it will be fine too. It's just the feelings of missing and worrying fill me up in a sudden.
I used to be self-centered and don't really give a damn on what's going on to the others. But I realize ever since I'm here in Melbourne, I starts to change. Still clumsy, still sensitive, still blur.. But more concern, more considerate. What make me change so much? I don't know. I just feel that it's a brand new me over here. And I just don't want to ruin it cause I might look like I don't care. But look can be deceived. So now.. I'm more concern. More considerate. More down-to-earth and straight-forward. Look over here! It's the brand new Sylvia aka XiaoWei you people will love to hang around with. Hahahaha. *perasan*
Another lonely day. Maybe I shouldn't say I'm all alone. But.. Have you ever fell in this situation? Where, there's a lot of people around but yet you felt so lonely.. Another lonely-phobia here! I don't really want that feeling to cover me up like I'm anti-social or anything, but sometimes I just don't know how to avoid it. At first, thought reading can cure the loneliness I'm having. But guess I'm wrong. So wrong! What I really want is something physically accompany. It's not like I'm obsess to have a boyfriend or anything. But I just need somebody there when I'm alone, when I'm scare, when I'm so confuse.. so.. Helpless. Sometimes, it's hard to do stuff all by yourself. Especially, when you know you're not that tough to handle everything by your own. But people around you thought you're tough enough to take everything. And they'll leave you with all the force.
Something happened. She's been robbed while buying stuff at the pharmacist. Although she tried to tell me in a more casual and relaxing way, but I know, I understand deep down inside.. She's shivering. How can she not be panic? She faced it all by herself. Without him around, without me around. This night. I cried. My 'him' is here to accompany me. Telling me everything would be alright. I know it will be fine too. It's just the feelings of missing and worrying fill me up in a sudden.
I used to be self-centered and don't really give a damn on what's going on to the others. But I realize ever since I'm here in Melbourne, I starts to change. Still clumsy, still sensitive, still blur.. But more concern, more considerate. What make me change so much? I don't know. I just feel that it's a brand new me over here. And I just don't want to ruin it cause I might look like I don't care. But look can be deceived. So now.. I'm more concern. More considerate. More down-to-earth and straight-forward. Look over here! It's the brand new Sylvia aka XiaoWei you people will love to hang around with. Hahahaha. *perasan*
Wednesday
Long Long Time
It's been so long since I last updated my blog. Don't you ever think that I've lost the passion of blogging. I've been updating my other blog which is the Cantonese Version blog I had for myself few days ago. Lots of things happen in this short period of not updating, some of them I couldn't even mention in my lovely blog, but I'll just tell some of it. *smile*
FIFA World Cup Germany 2006 Update.
Germany lost to Italy on the Semi-Final with Fabio Grosso and Del Piero goal. While France got the qualification to the final round from Portugal with a penalty goal by Zidane. Which means the final round Italy will be facing France. *Grin*
Vampire's back from holiday. Frankly speaking, the feelings I am having towards him lesser compare to before. Maybe because I'm tired of waiting him, as I know he wouldn't miss me at all. Or maybe, there's some other guy to replace him. I haven't return the stuff I promised to give it to him when I give up waiting and admiring him. I'm still wondering and confused. He's somebody I really fall for. But as everyone know, I even talked to his sister about it. She too agree that waiting for a empty hope, waiting for somebody who doesn't feel the same, is sad and hurt. Sigh. I'll just think about it. *smile*
I have to say that, I love my friends over here. Although I miss my buddies back in Malaysia a lot. I really wish that they will come over to visit me, and I'll bring them to my Melbourne's friends. How cool is that huh?!
Watched The Fast and The Furious : Tokyo Drift that night with Aeni, Sofia, Jason, Christine & Dennis. I have to admit that Tokyo Drift look something similar to Initial D. But... Oh My!! I love the way they drift, I love the cars.. And the SONG!!! "... i wonder if you know how they live in to-ky-o, if you seen it and you mean it then you know you have to go.. Fast and furious!!!.."
FIFA World Cup Germany 2006 Update.
Germany lost to Italy on the Semi-Final with Fabio Grosso and Del Piero goal. While France got the qualification to the final round from Portugal with a penalty goal by Zidane. Which means the final round Italy will be facing France. *Grin*
Vampire's back from holiday. Frankly speaking, the feelings I am having towards him lesser compare to before. Maybe because I'm tired of waiting him, as I know he wouldn't miss me at all. Or maybe, there's some other guy to replace him. I haven't return the stuff I promised to give it to him when I give up waiting and admiring him. I'm still wondering and confused. He's somebody I really fall for. But as everyone know, I even talked to his sister about it. She too agree that waiting for a empty hope, waiting for somebody who doesn't feel the same, is sad and hurt. Sigh. I'll just think about it. *smile*
I have to say that, I love my friends over here. Although I miss my buddies back in Malaysia a lot. I really wish that they will come over to visit me, and I'll bring them to my Melbourne's friends. How cool is that huh?!
Watched The Fast and The Furious : Tokyo Drift that night with Aeni, Sofia, Jason, Christine & Dennis. I have to admit that Tokyo Drift look something similar to Initial D. But... Oh My!! I love the way they drift, I love the cars.. And the SONG!!! "... i wonder if you know how they live in to-ky-o, if you seen it and you mean it then you know you have to go.. Fast and furious!!!.."
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